Risks

It's only the anxiety, I think to myself as I move forward with my business plan. I'll be honest enough to say that I'm not sure if I'll see it through; like, I may get to the point where I finish the plan, see how much money I would theoretically need, look at the interest in the terms of inked finance loans, and might in the end, decide the risk is too great.

Risk is something I think about often. I was born a planner with an adventurer's heart, a methodical and rational thinker, a safe, straight-arrow type person with a thrill seeker's soul. This is my problem. Having lived through crushing lows and desperate periods, I tend to walk a line which I know will keep me happy and balanced. But, the thrill sometimes is too great. Don't get me wrong, I dream and I pursue dreams. Freelancing is a dream, and one I pursue. Owning property is a dream, and one I continue to cultivate. So is the garden I planted, which will yield something and has taught me about my connection to the earth and my own two hands.

Everyone asses risks and then chooses whether the risks are worth taking or the potential backlash is too much. I'm somewhere in the middle, trying to think about the hypothetical payoff versus the negative outcomes. We'll see. But for now, I'm happy to dream and place one foot in front of the other, moving forward with my business as if I am really going to do it.