The Things I've Carried

I have held onto many things during the short 22 years I've walked this earth. I've held onto the negative attitudes and ideas I've had regarding mens' personalities and their differences from women; I've held onto my negative attitudes about sex. I've held onto the pain that has come tethered to the experiences I've lived through. I've held onto my childish ways. I've held onto the crushing moments and the dark times in my life; to the criticism I've received and the tears I've shed. I've held onto the heartache I've endured and the missed opportunities. I've held all of these things much like I've held onto the silver fillagree cuff that I wear on my hands and that I've never permanently lost; the one that has remained with me through the years though I've neglected it, taken it off, and dropped it. 

I hold onto these and other things, one of those being hope. Sometimes I fear that my hope wears too thin and that I might lose it all together. Those times that I become scared I might learn to become cynical. But if hope really does keep people moving into happiness and dreams, the future and positivity, then I hope Hope will never leave me. I also hope Hope won't disappoint me either; won't leave me hanging on a string, feeling more crushed than before