Oh if only my sensitive heart could grow to be as cold and unfeeling as stone, then maybe my nerves wouldn't feel so exposed and raw. One day perhaps, but I do find myself growing ever closer to blue hair and a shoulder tattoo of a Phoenix with a four leaved clover in its talons.
My day started with Tom Petty, moved to Dupar's with Millie, great conversation about gender studies, men, the negatives of masculinity, why men are stupid (there are sometimes that I think girls had it right at 8 when they think boys have coodies), the search for love, careers, cars (Geoffrey, one of the two males in my life that I can depend on), Kaldi, where an unexpected conversation with an attractive man named Mark apparently infused me with the knowledge that when not appreciated, I need to pack the fuck up and go off to Cartagena, Colombia. A phone call later I had some good news about a job prospect. This led to home where I planted a pineapple top in hopes it will grow into lush fruit, patting of my darling and obnoxious Aussie Pup and sweet Willie, coffee meet up and rich conversation where I was told, much to my happiness that as I age I will re-find my enthusiastic optimism and be able to talk myself up into a good mood after talking myself into a depressed one. Which means, according to Gaul that age will bring good things, instead of all of the negative things we're told it does.
Tom Petty sings
"The waiting is the hardest part/
Everyday you see one more card/
You take it on faith, you take it to the heart/
The waiting is the hardest part"
I will wait, for as my father said, all I can do is to do the best I can. And with those words he always told me he'd be proud as long as I tried my best. So that's what I'll do and I'll place some faith in waiting.
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